Cajun Mutt Press Featured Writer 08/12/20

Asleep

I shouldn’t drink anymore on this plane
The larger woman next to me in the aisle has decided for both of us that taking a piss is simply
out of the question
Drinks are expensive anyhow
And they don’t have the cheap ones here
Or allow outside liquids
Probably to corner the aerial market
And they serve their expensive whiskey cokes for 9$ in a glorified shotglass
Nothing’s going well here…
I got caught with a butter knife in my bag by security
I had drunkenly stolen it from an airport restaurant
(which was also extremely expensive)
during my layover the last time I flew
Just to show I could get a knife on a plane
But then I forgot about it
And got caught 3 weeks later on the next flight
Fucking round trip tickets
Though I didn’t even take the time to go into my bag
Karma (not actually karma I’m just an idiot) I suppose
I wasn’t going to do anything with the butter knife
Either time
I’m just a prick like that
Especially drunk
Wanted to see if I could
What could you even do with a butter knife
Threaten the stewardess for a cheaper drink I suppose
But what’s the point
I can’t even piss

©2020 J. Hol All rights reserved.

Screenshot 2020-07-06 at 11.17.23 AM

J. Hol is a shoestring traveling writer and artist from Providence, Rhode Island. His work primarily focuses on modern transient lifestyle, struggles with mental illness, and the humor of mundane directionless depravity.

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